PART II:
(The next morning. SpongeBob wakes up, and goes to the Barg-N-Mart).
SB: Hmm, classic Kelp, diet kelp, vanilla kelp, black cherry vanilla kelp...hmmmm....
(Patrick rushes up to Spongebob.)
P: SpongeBob!!! It came true!!! It happened!!!
SB: What, Pat?
P: This is her, SpongeBob-- This- is Sheila..
(he introduces a really dark-looking fish who carries a frown everywhere, wearing a Slipknot t-shirt)
SB: Wow, Pat! Thats great! Well, nice to meet you Sheila!
Sh: Bite me.
SB: Well, Pat she sure is nice! Why don't we all go out on a group date at Weenie Hut Juinors? I hear theyre screening the next Mermaid-Man and Barnacle Boy trailer there!
P: I would love to, but alas, Sheila and I are leaving for the fancy restaurant later tonight. I'm afraid I can't go.
SB: But Pat, we can get your favorite ice cream...
P: SpongeBob, I can't.
SB: C'mon, Pat! Or we can play Eeels and Escalaters!
P: SpongeBob-
SB: Or--
P: SpongeBob! Stop! Y'know grow up a little bit! Stop living in a world where nothing matters except "Cooking Krabby Patties" or "Watching Mermaid-Man and Barnacle Boy". Grow up some. C'mon Sheila we're outta here.
(Patrick walks away.)
SB: Pat....??
(It fades out. Later that night, at Weenie Hut Juniors.)
SB: (crying)
(the electronic waiter comes up.)
EW: Would you like another cream soda float...weenie?
SB: No thanks, Fred. I got enough my mind now.
(one of the nerds gets onstage.)
Nerd: Everyone...this is it...the final trailer to the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy Movie!
(the crowd cheers)
SB: I sure wonder how Pat's doing right now...
(at the reall fancy restaurant, you know, the one with the ship in the glass.)
(Patrick sits with his girlfriend)
P: You know, Sheila...youre the greatest.
Sh: ...
P: And speachless too! You know, you and me could travel the world...meet the president...sit on the couch and watch the Coconut fall on the guys head together....
(silence)
(Patrick puts his arm around Sheila)
p: Sheila! Let's get married! I promise itll be great! We can get married in the fanciest place!
(cut to the road sign that says "You are now entering Atlantis (Undersea equivelent to Las Vegas)
(cut to a neon light that reads "Weddings $3.00 and less")
(inside, patrick and a nonchalant Sheila stand there in front of a cigarrette smoking elderly woman)
P: Trust me, Sheila!! This will be the best night of your life!
(the elderly woman laughs.)
Elderly woman: ha,... thats what they all say.)
(Back in Bikini Bottom, SpongeBob walks home in the night)
SB: (practicing a speech) Patrick, I'm sorry I pressured you. I know how hard it is having a girlfr-- no, thats not right.. (in a manly voice) Patrick, I apologize for the...no...
(he walks up to patrick's rock and finds a sticky note atached to it.)
SB: Wha--
(peels off note.)
(reads poorly written note)
SB: "Spongebob, It is time for me to move on. Begin my life. Start a family. Thats why Sheila and I have gone to Atlantis to get married. Goodbye."
SB: Pat!!! No!!
(Don't worry guys, most of patricks weird behavior will be wrapped up in Part III,)