belive= believe
Laugh= :XD: you don't just put laugh anywhere you could say don't laugh or I'm laughing :XD:
`K?= Okay but then most confusing you put Ok
unknowner= Is this even a word?
I was in 5th grade. Miss Burlingtons class= I was in Miss Burlingtons class in the 5th grade.
I felt like punching him. Hard. = I felt like punching him hard.
Just a big BAM! on the head.= 
I would laugh. We would still be friends.= I would laugh but we were always still friends.
For a few seconds the sun was green. I stared. Only for a few seconds it was green. It shook...the bus I mean. = this is one of the most confusing sentences in the story
When the doorbell tolled. I grabbed the doorknob. = When the doorbell tolled, I had grabbed the doorknob.
Then my life changed. He grabbed me.= Then my life changed and he grabbed me.
Overall this story is confusing beyond words
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You messed up too, actually. You forgot a few commas. The one thats starts "For a few seconds..." is ok. Thats the way he wanted it to sound. Its like he was telling you this story verbally. Thats the great thing about literature, you want to feel like you were there. Like I said, he could've used commas instead of periods to link those sentences together. He didnt have to change the wording on all of them. Just maybe one or so.. Besides, you misspell alot as well. The kid wrote a story. Gee-Whiz, it isn't a spelling contest. Either you like or you dont, there was no need for that.
