Author Topic: Complaint about USB...  (Read 3868 times)

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SS4Gohan

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Complaint about USB...
« on: May 26, 2006, 02:19:28 pm »
To respond to all of United SpongeBob's slurs would take up too much room and time. I would like to address the most insensate-to-the-core ones, though. I will start this discussion by arguing that like much conventional wisdom, USB's smears contain too much convention and not enough wisdom. Then, I will present evidence that the concepts underlying USB's meretricious campaigns are like the Ptolemaic astronomy, which could not have been saved by positing more epicycles or eliminating some of the more glaring discrepancies. The fundamental idea -- that the heavens revolve around the Earth -- was wrong, just as USB's idea that its anecdotes prevent smallpox is wrong. I trust USB about as far as I can throw it. Not that I've come to expect any better from USB.

USB demands obeisance from its apple-polishers. Then, once they prove their loyalty, USB forces them to prevent people from thinking and visualizing beyond an increasingly psychologically caged existence. USB's constant whining and yammering is a background noise that never seems to go away. (Actually, USB's head is so far in rectal defilade it would require major surgery to extricate it but that's not important now.) I'd like organizations who fix blame for social stress, economic loss, or loss of political power on a target group whose constructed guilt provides a simplistic explanation to find themselves behind bars, looking out. The best example of this, culled from many, would have to be the time USB tried to subvert existing lines of power and information. I am confident that genuine patriots will perceive the veracity of my statements regarding USB's venal op-ed pieces. This implies that USB wants to diminish society's inducements to good behavior. Faugh.

There is a proper place in life for hatred. Hatred of that which is wrong is a powerful and valuable tool. But when USB perverts hatred in order to shift our society from a culture of conscience to a culture of consensus, it becomes clear that it has refused to make a public apology for its biased bromides. Now, that's a strong conclusion to draw just from the evidence I've presented in this letter. So let me corroborate it by saying that I am not fooled by USB's vulgar and eristic rhetoric. I therefore gladly accept the responsibility of notifying others that if USB gets its way, we will soon be engulfed in a Dark Age of autism and indescribable horror. That's why I'm telling you that I challenge it to point out any text in this letter that proposes that it never engages in cankered, malodorous, or ribald politics. It isn't there. There's neither a hint nor a suggestion of such a thing. I do not have the time, in one sitting, to go into the long answer as to why USB is incapable of writing a letter without using such phrases as "headstrong, Pecksniffian twerps", "warped paper-pushers", "disrespectful shirkers", or some combination thereof. But the short answer is that when I say that my opinions are the obverse of its, this does not, I repeat, does not mean that a knowledge of correct diction, even if unused, evinces a superiority that covers cowardice or stupidity. This is a common fallacy held by the worst kinds of self-righteous anarchists there are. We could opt to sit back and let USB weaken our mental and moral fiber. Most people, however, would argue that the cost in people's lives and self-esteem is an extremely high price to pay for such inaction on our part. If you don't think that I find USB's ruinous policies and dubious values unacceptable, then you've missed the whole point of this letter.

USB pompously claims that the media should "create" news rather than report it. That sort of nonsense impresses many people, unfortunately. As for me, I have no bombs, no planes, no artillery, and no terrorist plots. But I do have weapons and tactics that are far more deadly: pure light and simple truth.

You know what? I welcome USB's comments. However, USB needs to realize that its most imprudent tactic is to fabricate a phony war between spineless dips and postmodernist cowards. This way, USB can subjugate both groups into helping it turn positions of leadership into positions of complacency. I truly don't want that to happen, which is why I'm telling you that if USB's thinking were cerebral rather than glandular, it wouldn't consider it such a good idea to instill a subconscious feeling of guilt in those of us who disagree with its treatises. When I observe USB's secret agents' behavior, I can't help but recall the proverbial expression, "monkey see, monkey do". That's because, like it, they all want to paralyze any serious or firm decision and thereby become responsible for the weak and half-hearted execution of even the most necessary measures. Also, while a monkey might think that taxpayers are a magic purse that never runs out of gold, the fact remains that it obsesses not with what it can do for this country but with what it can extract from it. So don't feed me any phony baloney about how malignant whiners make the best scout leaders and schoolteachers. That's just not true. USB likes to compare its reports to those that shaped this nation. The comparison, however, doesn't hold up beyond some uselessly broad, superficial similarities that are so vague and pointless, it's not even worth summarizing them. There is one final irony to my story. You'd have to be the town fool to think that United SpongeBob's deeds epitomize wholesome family entertainment.

Offline RandomDude18

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2006, 02:32:40 pm »
I completely agree. If we don't put a stop to this now, it will overwhelm us!

Vicky

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #2 on: May 26, 2006, 02:36:38 pm »
indeed i agree

Offline ssj4gogita4

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #3 on: May 26, 2006, 06:41:08 pm »
I deleted the posts that were not necessary or didnt contribute to the topic at all. Please stay on topic :)

Patback399

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #4 on: May 26, 2006, 07:01:54 pm »
You know what? This seems like a big joke. I mean, it's as if he's replacing a certain word with "USB".

TailFin

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #5 on: May 26, 2006, 07:23:30 pm »
(scence resmebling patrick after SpongeBob explains the best thing about a secret)

ok...ya lost moi

carterhawk

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #6 on: May 26, 2006, 07:58:14 pm »
Quote
I deleted the posts that were not necessary or didnt contribute to the topic at all. Please stay on topic :)
[snapback]289393[/snapback]

my post was on topic you guber. since ssj has so deeply offended me:

This site will generate a very similar complaint letter, in fact i was able to reproduce a good portion of the Hate is a powerfull tool blah blah blah paragraph:

http://www.pakin.org/complaint?
« Last Edit: May 26, 2006, 07:58:58 pm by carterhawk »

garyfan

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #7 on: May 27, 2006, 06:16:40 am »
I've notcied these things too and I agree.

Offline Daniel

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #8 on: May 27, 2006, 07:02:02 am »
Can some one sum it up for me in alot less words?

Banana

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #9 on: May 27, 2006, 07:47:57 am »
Yeah you didn't write that.

Dragon Of Grief

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #10 on: May 27, 2006, 08:34:30 am »
So in many long words you are basically saying USB sucks =)

Offline Roger

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #11 on: May 27, 2006, 08:54:35 am »
He's using the same thing that one dude did with the "complaint letter about Green Day" topic...

Offline SizzlinSean

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #12 on: May 27, 2006, 09:53:49 am »
Wow. Somebody has a life...

Offline IceFox

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #13 on: May 27, 2006, 11:12:13 am »
Quote
He's using the same thing that one dude did with the "complaint letter about Green Day" topic...
[snapback]289479[/snapback]
And what I used for my OMFGWTFBBQ essay.

Offline DiE HaRrD PuNk

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Complaint about USB...
« Reply #14 on: June 04, 2006, 12:23:48 pm »
wow..that was so stupid i didnt even read the first paragraph...that was totally copied and pasted and USB was added in...he is saying this forum sucks, but yet he should think before talking..
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