Ok... I'm back from the foodbank with this week's offerings:
o Louis Kemp artificial lobster meat, 8oz, expired November 27, 1999. 2 packages.
o Trader Vic's "Javanese" dressing, 12oz, expired June 14, 2001.
o Gatorade "Riptide Rush", 32oz, no date shown on bottle.
o USDA canned pears, 15oz, expiration date encrypted.
o Great Value tuna, 6oz, expiration date encrypted.
o Lucerne chive cottage cheese, 16oz, expires November 14, 2001.
o Hand-filled baggie of unknown type nuts. They appear badly desiccated and have a slight stale odour.
There was one package or bottle of each item in my bag, except for the artificial lobster meat; there was two packs of that.
The Trader Vic's dressing appears to be composed of an amorphous brown blob occupying approximately half of the bottle, surrounded by a transparent amber fluid; which occupies most of the remainder, except for a large gas bubble on top.
Everything except the cottage cheese, tuna, Gatorade, and pears will have to be thrown out or flushed. The bag of nuts will go to my pet rat, if he's dumb enough to eat them.
Tune in next week for The Misadventures of Foodbank Toilet!
(EDIT): Cottage cheese was fungused, and also had to be disposed of.
Most likely, it had spent too much time out of refrigeration.
(EDIT): Mr. Trader Vic, your drug urinator test came back. You've been abusing hydrogen disulfide, ammonia, sodium tetraoxide, and nitrogen dioxide. Shame on you.
(EDIT): Veemon refused the nuts. Instead, he squatted over the small pile I placed in his cage and uranated all over them. Then he ran up to me and begged for his usual cat treats.
