Topic: Spongebob Episode (fanfic) #7

[SS4Gohan]

As you probably know already, I skipped from 2 to 7 because 3, 4, and 5 were too perverted... okay anyway here's the 7th one:

Rated PG again for... well you should know by now

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
The SpongeBob Gang, That's Who!
Fanfic 7
Gary in the Hot Seat



-Crowd cheers as Meredith walks in-

Meredith: Hello, everyone. I hope you all remember our exciting night yesterday. Bill Gates won the million dollars! (Crowd goes wild) Now that that exciting evening is back in our minds, let's play ................................................................................................... ..............................................................Who wants to be a millionaire! (Crowd goes wild)
   Meredith: Now, today we have ten contestants who have flown in from all over the world, each of them going through different lengths. So keep in mind that NO ONE is from the same town. They are:

Eugene Krabs, Bikini Bottom (Waves)
Mama Krabs, Bikini Bottom (Smiles)
Patrick Star, Bikini Bottom (Drops Krabby Patty and waves)
Squidward Tentacles, Bikini Bottom (Doesn't pay attention, continues polishing clarinet)
Patchy the Pirate, Encino (Smiles)
Potty the bird, Don't know where (Puts shirt on and waves)
Fred, Potty (Stops biting Potty)
King Neptune, he is the king of the sea (Attempts to tell a lame joke, but is drowned out by crowd)
Gary SquarePants, Nobody gives a crap (Doesn't pay attention)
SpongeBob SquarePants, Bikini Bottom (Grins and flashes golden jellyfish net)

Meredith: Now, let's do the fattest, I mean, fastest figure question.

In earliest to latest, tell me which b… I mean, who… I mean, woman, was born:
(a) Queen Elizabeth III
(b) Rosa Parks
© Marylin Munroe
(d) Mary Kate Olsen

-A murmur shoots through the audience at Meredith's wording.-

Gary: (surprised by the crowd and music, falls on keypad, hitting buttons)
Everyone: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. .. . . . . .
Meredith: And, now let's see who was dumb enough to answer . . . I mean (pulls collar), let's see who got it right.

Gary: 1.27 sec.
Squidward: 1.27000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 sec.
Neptune: 9.38 sec.

Meredith: It seems that Gary is in the hot seat.

-Flashy, music, commercial break-

During Commercial Break

-Backstage-

Stage Guy: Meredith, what is up with you? You're sinking.
Meredith: Shut up. You only care about the station's ratings.
ABC Guy: Is there a problem with that? (Raises eyebrow)
Meredith: Shut up, or I'LL KILL YOU ALL!!!!
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1: You're not Meredith!
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2: His name is . . . what's his name?
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1: Who cares? He ain't Meredith. Let's unmask him.
Meredith: Shut up you fools, I am Meredith, no matter what you say!

-Weird Guys #1 & #2 put Meredith in headlock and rip mask off, revealing . . .
-. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .-
-. . . . Dr. Fish!

Weird Guy Hanging Out #1: Him again?! I thought he was done for after he killed himself for killing a patient.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2: Me too. It was him. Oh, well. Let's find the real Meredith.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1: Good idea.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2: Maybe he's hidden in the broom closet, where everyone's impersonator always hides the impersonatee.
Stage Guy: You know lot of big words.
ABC Guy: Get her back before the commercial break is over. Without Meredith, our ratings will go down the drain.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1: We're only rescuing Meredith because she's cool, she has money, and the writer wants us to. We're not rescuing her to save the ratings of a station that uses the first three letters of the alphabet for initials. You did that because you want 4-year-olds to watch your station… anything for ratings.
ABC Guy: (Pales) That is not true! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR! LIAR!
Weird Guys Hanging Out #'s 1 & 2: (Walking away) Yeah, whatever.

End Commercial Break

Gary: (sits patiently)

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Mr. Krabs: Where is Meredith?
Audience: (Murmurs and swears and curses)
Squidward: (Holds up clarinet) If Meredith won't do this then I will.

-Audience cheers and boos-

The People At Home

Daughter: Daddy, why do they have clarinets?
Daddy: Because they're weird honey.
Daughter: Where is Meredith gone, Daddy?
Daddy: To a place with hot chocolate.
Daughter: Why did Meredith talk about bikinis, Daddy?
Daddy: Someone very dumb named a city Bikini Bottom, and we all had to here Meredith say bikini.
Daughter: They're weird. I don't like them. Let's watch something else.
Daddy: I don't think so. This is a perfect example of what not to do. Let's watch.
Daughter: Okay, Daddy. You do know best.

Back in the Studio

-Squidward had played a few wrong notes on his clarinet and had been about to step into Meredith's seat when . . . .
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Muffled voice: Wait!

Every single person in the studio: Huh?!

-Music plays and confetti flies-

Muffled voice: I'm here!
Audience: WHO?!
Muffled voice: Meredith!
Muffled voice Meredith: (Walks into the stage and sits down)
Squidward: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

-Squidward thinks: My fame . . . my glory . . . all ruined. I HATE MEREDITH! She is ****ING ***CH. She will die!
-Squidward lashes out at Meredith, blasting her with small blasts of his clarinet, making it look like a machine gun's job. Then he stabs her through the heart with the clarinet-

-Audience boos-

ABC Guy: Oh no! Without Meredith, our ratings will stink!
Stage Guy: How can you do that, Squidward?
Squidward: I wanted to! (Flashes clarinet)
ABC Guy: Who CARES?! Without Meredith, we won't have any ratings. We need Meredith back!
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3: I have an idea.
ABC Guy: What is it?!
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3: I'll use this special emergency number to contact the writer. He'll bring Meredith back.
ABC Guy: Brilliant!
Everyone else: Huh!?

-The people gather around a phone and Weird Guy Hanging Out #3 does his stuff-

Weird Guy Hanging Out #3: Sammy? Are you there?
Sammy: I'm here, WGHO #3
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3: Uh . . . Sammy? The ABC Guy wants you to bring Meredith back to life.
Sammy: That can't be done, WGHO #3
ABC Guy: Please?
Sammy: I may be the writer, but I won't assist you in your petty journey and wish for Meredith. Squidward killed her for a reason, WGHO #3
ABC Guy: You stink, man!
Sammy: When I put finger to key, I can do anything. Now, die, ABCG.
ABC Guy: You can't do anything to me, you . . . . (Vanishes)
Sammy: Now, WGHO #3, go somewhere before my temper wears thin.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3: Yes sir!
Sammy: …And because you didn't bombard me like ABCG did, you may have Meredith back. Don't kill her this time, Squidward.

-Weird Guy #3 says goodbye, Squidward promises to be good, and the show gets on the road, with Meredith back-

The People at Home

Daughter: Daddy, what happened?
Daddy: They brought Meredith back, honey.
Daughter: Who was the guy talking like this on the phone?
Daddy: He was Sammy, the author and inventor of us and this fanfic.
Daughter: Oh.

Back at the Studio

Meredith: Okay, now that we have time let's play some . . . .. . . . . . . . . . Who Wants To Be A Millionaire!
Gary: Meow?
Everyone: What?!
Translator: What am I supposed to do?
Meredith: I'll tell you when it's time. First, let's see who you are. What are your hobbies, Gary?
Gary: Meow
Translator: Eat and sleep
Meredith: Uh, well, on with the game.

-Flashy music, Meredith tells Gary how to play, and what the lifelines are-

Meredith: Okay, Gary, are you ready for the game?
Gary: Meow!
Translator: Yes, I am!
Meredith: Okay! Well, then let's see . . . the hundred-dollar-question . . .

Who wrote this fanfic?
(a) Tom
(b) Jerry
© Sammy
(d) Pikachu

Meredith: So, Gary, what do you want to do?
Gary: Meow
Translator: Um . . . I'm not too familiar with this fanfic . . . I need to use my lifeline, Meredith. I think the 50-50 will help.

-Meredith gets the computer to get rid of two answers. Sammy and Tom remain-

Gary: Meow
Translator: Oh, no. Those were the two that confused me. Meredith, I need to ask the audience.

-Lights shine brighter-

Meredith: Audience, Gary needs your help. As you may not know, those keypad thingies are for a use…

-Audience gasps-

Meredith: …not just to play. Using the button in them, vote for which you think is right: (a) Tom, or © Sammy.

-Everyone votes-

Meredith: Well, Gary, the results are in and . . . we have 99% on Sammy, and one wise guy on Tom.
Gary: Meow…
Translator: Wise guy? Hmmm… I have a hunch, Meredith, but I think I'll phone a friend to be on the safe side. I'll phone Sammy . . .
DON'T PHONE ME. CALL SOMEONE ELSE, GARY
Gary: Meow
Translator: Okay, I'll phone Snellie.

-Meredith gets Snellie on the phone, hands it to Gary, with 30 sec.-

Gary: Meow. . . .
Translator: Snellie, I need to know . . . . (Tells Snellie question and choices)
Snellie: MEOW!
Translator: . . . . GARY, YOU LITTLE IDIOT! IT'S SAMMY! THAT'S WHO YOU JUST CALLED, YOU <censored> <censored> <censored> <censored> <censored> <censored> MOTHER <censored>, SPONGEBOB-CRAZY <censored>. NOW ANSWER IT CORRECTLY OR DIE!
Gary: Meow
Translator: ok

-Snellie hangs up, and Meredith turns to Gary-

Gary: Meow
Translator: Well, Meredith, I know what you're thinking, and, let me tell you: Not many people or translators can read Snellie, but I can. She wants me to pick Tom. So that's what I'm doing.
Meredith: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Gary: Meow
Translator: It is my final answer.
Meredith: Well, Gary the correct answer is . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Sammy!

-Instead of "Awwwwwwwwwwwwwww"ing, the crowd snickers and laughs-

Gary: Meow?
Translator: I lost? Before I even got started?
Meredith: You . . . HA! AHAHAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAH! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH! HAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAH!

-Tears roll down Meredith's face-

-Gary dejectedly walks away-

-As he walks away, the crowd "Awwwwww"s for him-

Meredith: Well that has been a very exciting contestant.

Commercial Break

To be continued...

-SS4Gohan

[SS4Gohan]

sorry, all the answer c's appeared as the copyright symbol: © but oh well... uh... did anyone like it?... no one's replied yet

-SS4Gohan

[garyfan]

it waz ok but it did not seem realistc I mean I do not think squidward would kill some one and then u could bring her back and Gary is supposed 2 be smart it just waz well not realistic

[SS4Gohan]

I know but Gary was bored he probably didn't want to win anyway and Squidward was mad because he didn't get to play his clarinet

-SS4Gohan

[SS4Gohan]

Okay, sorry about double posting right now, but I'm already done with part 2 so here it is:


Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
The SpongeBob Gang, That's Who!
Ch. 2
Those Who Deserve It



During Commercial Break

The People At Home

Daughter: How come they laughed at him, Daddy?
Daddy: Because, honey, they don't like him.
Daughter: Why?
Daddy: Because he was stupid.
Daughter: Why?
Daddy: Because, he wasn't brought up to be smart?
Daughter: Who is going to win the one million dollar award, Daddy?
Daddy: Because . . . er, those who deserve it honey.

Backstage

Weird Guy Hanging Out #1*: (to #2) Hey, what did we do with that Fish dude?
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2*: (shrugs)
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1*: Does that mean he's still on the loose?
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2*: I guess.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1*: Should we look for him?
Weird Guy Hanging Out #2*: Naaaaaaaah. He'll cause some trouble, we'll know it's him, and save the day, and maybe ABC Guy will give us money.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1*: (Stares)
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3*: (Walks up to them with angelic look on face)
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1 & #2*: What did yyyyyyyyyyooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu do?
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3*: I turned Fish into the cops.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1 & #2*: But . . . but ABC Guy won't give us money.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #3*: Money is only given to those who deserve it.
Weird Guy Hanging Out #1 & #2*: (Scratches head)

*Weird Guy's Hanging Out will now only be called by their number. I will only say their identity number (#3, #2, & #1)

End Commercial Break

Meredith: Well, we're back here . . . our studio. Anyway, I ought to tell you something . . . (Scratches head)
Audience:...
Meredith: Oh, yeah!
Audience: (sighs)
Meredith: This. Episode. Of. Who. Wants. To. Be. A. Millionaire. Will. Be. Three. Hours. Long.
Audience:...
Patrick: I think he said this episode will be three hours long.
Audience: (Bursts out in applause)
Patrick: (Takes a bow)
Meredith: (Scratches head)
Meredith: Now, I also have made it my business to make a two million dollar prize today, so ABC's ratings will skyrocket, and I'll get more money . . . er, did I say that out loud?
Audience:...
Meredith: Never mind. Anywaaaaaaay . . . um . . . lemme see . . .
Audience: (sighs)
Meredith: The two million dollar award will only be given to those who deserve . . . nowwwwwww . . . there's nothing I need to tell you, so let's start . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Who Wants to be a Millionaire!
Audience: (Cheers)
Meredith: Oh, wait, I missed something.
Audience: (Sighs)
Meredith: Our friendly friends at AT&T, who I always get to make calls for us, are having phone trouble, for unknown reasons. So, we won't have anyone calling, which means we have to keep these contestants till AT&T fixes there phones.
SpongeBob: (Gets out baseball cards to show Patrick)
Meredith: And now, with that out of the way, let's play . . .

-Everyone sighs-

Meredith: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 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. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Who Wants to be a Millionaire!

-Fancy music starts, and Meredith reads the fastest figure question-

Meredith: Okay, time for the fastest figure question.
List, in west to east, the following oceans . . .
beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep!

-Everyone gasps, except for Patrick and SpongeBob, who are looking at baseball cards-

Huge, deep, powerful, female voice (through bullhorn): Shut up, Meredith! It's obvious that only those who deserve it will get to the hot seat. Now jam it with the fastest figure question, and get the dude who belongs there up!
Meredith: Okay, okay, just tell me who, and stop shouting!
Huge, deep, powerful, female voice (through bullhorn): The ultimate sea creature, the only person that really belongs in the hot seat, is without a doubt . . .
Squidward thinks: Finally, my turn.
Huge, deep, powerful, female voice (through bullhorn): SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!!!!

-SpongeBob and Patrick pay no attention, and continue looking at baseball cards-

Squidward: (Stands up and shouts) Just who are you!
Huge, deep, powerful, female voice (through bullhorn): (Average height college girl appears) My name's Meredith, but I'm nothing like the other Meredith.
Squidward: Just how can you decide who goes up there?

-Meredith #2 walks up to Squidward and whispers something in his ear, Squidward instantly quiets down.-

-Meredith #2 walks on-

#3*: What'd you tell him?
Meredith #2: I told him I knew a fan who wanted to meet him. The fan's favorite character was Squidward.
#3*: Impressive.

*#3 is Weird Guy Hanging Out #3. I said earlier that Weird Guys Hanging Out will only be called by their number, but you may have forgotten.

Meredith (#1): SpongeBob, come on up here.

-SpongeBob and Patrick continue looking at baseball cards-

Mr. Krabs: (Smacks SpongeBob, and gets him in the hot seat)

-SpongeBob walks up and sits down in the hot seat, carrying the golden jellyfish net out where everyone can see it-

-Meredith is nervous because of the golden jellyfish net, and skips right to the first question. She makes a mistake and gives SpongeBob an easy question-

Who is the host of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?
a.) Alex
b.) Pat
c.) No one in particular
d.) Meredith

-SpongeBob listens to the question, and then looks at baseball cards-

Meredith: So, SpongeBob, uh, what's your answer?

-SpongeBob doesn't look up from hockey cards-

SpongeBob: (Without paying attention) A (Gasps at a neat card)
Meredith: Is that your, uh, final answer?

-Before SpongeBob can say anything, the lights in the stadium go out-

I know that was a corny ending but oh well... part 3 coming soon

-SS4Gohan
 

[SS4Gohan]

Okay, I've waited long enough... I'm not sure if this would really be called triple posting since it's been 3 days... but no one replied and I've already writen up to fanfic 7 part 8... yeah I know... so here's part 3... and I'm not gonna post 4 times in a row, so someone reply!!! Oh wait one more thing: The ABC Guy in this chapter is a different one than the one who is in part 1 that I killed.
 
Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
The SpongeBob Gang, That's Who!
Ch. 3
Nothing Smart




-As the lights are out, people in audience are all in suspense as they wonder who turned the lights off-

Entire Audience: (Yawn) This is boooooo-o-o-o-o-orr-r-r-ring!

-The suspense keeps the audience awake, at their senses, waiting for the next move to happen-

Entire Audience: (Yawns) (Snores)

-#1, #2, and #3 think they know what is going on. Do they really?-

#3: I'm telling you, it's the only way!
#1: (Snore)
#2: (Whacks #1 upside the head)
#1: Wha? Huh?
#2: Dr. Fish couldn't have escaped from the jail. They have guns and stuff. You know he's too weak to handle them.
#3: Yeah, but he's smart.
#1: Do you think I should have vanilla ice cream or chocolate ice cream?
#2 and #3: (Whack #1 upside the head)
#1: (confused) Was it something I said?

-The Weird Guys Hanging Out believe Dr. Fish is behind this. Are they right?-

ABC Guy: Cue commercial!!!!!!!!

-Commercial is cued-

The People At Home

Daughter: What happened?
Daddy: I don't know, honey.
Daughter: You're dumb.
Daddy: (A tear rolls down his cheek) [In a hurt voice] I… I… I… am not! (Sniffs)
Daughter: (Snorts) [Grows twelve feet] [Gets mean look in eyes and screams loudly] YOU'RE DUMB IF I SAY YOU ARE!!! NOW SHUT UP. I WANNA WATCH WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONAIRE!!!!
Daddy: ok.

Backstage

ABC Guy: My career is ruined!!! My life is over!!!! For the first time, a project I was in charge of has gotten bad ratings!!!!! My life is over!!!!!!!
#1: Relax, we know what's going on.
#3 and #2: (Hoping #1 will take a hint) We don't know anything. Not one of the three of us.
#1: Sure we do. Dr. Fish has blacked out the lights. He's fame hungry and wants to get on TV.
#2 and #3: (Whack #1 upside the head)

-#2 and #3 drag #1 away, and they talk to him-

#2: Okay, you idiot, you just lost our chance to make some big bucks!!!
#3: Yeah… Hey, I thought we were doing that to serve justice, not for money!!
#2: It's obvious what's going one here.
#1 and #3: What?
#2: You . . . (Points at #1) are a dumb butt!!
#1: But I…
#2: And you . . . (Points at #3) . . . are a mortal freak!!
#3: As is that's…
#2: I'M THE ONLY PERSON WHO HAS A BRAIN HERE!!!!

-The Weird Guys Hanging Out have figured out what their problems are. But will everyone else do it? Is ABC Guy smart enough to get #1's clue?-

ABC Guy: (Thinking hard) What does it mean? (Remembers back and hears #2 saying: "Dr. Fish has blacked out the lights. He's fame hungry and wants to get on TV.") What does it mean?

-ABC Guy decides to ask Meredith for help, but, in the darkness, he cannot find Meredith.-

-ABC Guy keeps on thinking and - miraculously - it hits him-

ABC Guy: Could it…? Could it mean…? Could it … just maybe … mean that Dr. Fish blacked out the lights in hope to get on TV? It's…, it's a far-fetched thing but it just might be true!!!

-Out of nowhere, a Meredith carrying a flashlight and Dr. Fish walks in-

Meredith: I found this guy messing with the lights. I fixed it up. They'll be back on in five minutes, and the cops are coming to pick up Fish here.
ABC Guy: (Scratches head)

-The lights back on, people are ready to continue the game, with SpongeBob in the hot seat-

< Commercial>

Meredith: Okay, SpongeBob, I can't seem to remember what happened before the lights went out, but I know you didn't win any money, so here's the $100 question.

Which coin is worth one dollar?
a.) the quarter
b.) the cat
c.) the penny
d.) the duck

Meredith: Well, which is it?

-Before SpongeBob can answer, a stampede of what appear to be girls and boys from 6 to 40 years old rushing at SpongeBob, a total of 10,000 men, 8,000 women, 6,000 teens, and 4,000 kids-

Meredith #2: (Through bullhorn) I brought a fan club for you, SpongeBob!!!!!
SpongeBob: I… I… I… I don't know what to say! I've never been so happy!

-SpongeBob is happily swept away by the fan club, leaving Meredith with a very confused look on her face-

Meredith: Uh, I think I should start the next round.

Part 4 coming whenever someone replies... and I don't know how long that'll be

-SS4Gohan

[the star]

That was................................................................good. (joke) :biggrin:

[djwit_atie]

ummmm...... i............ thought it waz, um a kewl?

[SS4Gohan]

Uh... thanks people for the... er, compliments... here's part 4

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
The SpongeBob Gang, That's Who!
Ch. 4
Cheezoid



Meredith: Yes, the next round is an order.
Meredith: Okay, everyone, uh... here's the fastest figure question.

Order the movies featuring outer space premiered, first to last
a.) Stars Wars
b.) Star Trek: First Contact
c.) Lost in Space
d.) Galaxy Quest

-Everything beeps while they wait 20 seconds-

Meredith: Okay, let's see who got it.

Squidward: 6.799999999999999999999999999 sec.
Mr. Krabs: 6.8 sec.
Patchy: 6.799999999999999999192345678 sec.

Squidward: (growls)
Meredith: Well, Patchy, you won! Come on up to the hot seat.

-Patchy walks up, smiling. He sits in the hot seat-

Meredith: So, Patchy, tell us a bit about yourself.
Patchy: Well, it's been my dream ever since I was a boy to ride on a pirate ship...
Meredith: Have you ever done that?
Patchy: Yes, but my parrot Potty always ruins it. (Sniffs) (Tear in eye).
Meredith: Okay.
Meredith: On with the $100-question, then, Patchy. Feeling confident?
Patchy: (Looking glum) Just get to it.
Meredith: Right.

Who am I?
a.) Meredith
b.) Bill Gates
c.) God
d.) Satan

Patchy: Well . . . what was your name again?
Meredith: It's Meredith.
Patchy: Thanks. I'll go with A: Meredith.
Meredith: (Breathes) You've got it

-Polite applause-

Meredith: Okay, next question.

What is a butterfly?
a.) a fly in butter
b.) an insect
c.) nothing
d.) dust

Meredith: So what do you think, Patchy?
Patchy: Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, Meredith, I think the answer has to be "B".
Meredith: You're right! People, he's won $200! That's a record for tonight!
Entire Audience: (silence)
Meredith: Okay, the $500 question!

-Time passes-

Meredith: Okay, Patchy. This is it. You're almost at the half million, and you could set a record for tonight. What do you think about it?
Patchy: Just on with the question!
Meredith: (Thinking: Poor and uncooperative sport) The next question:

Who is the current owner of the Chum Bucket?

-Patchy reflects as he hears the answers-

a.) Karen
Patchy: "No, she gave it up."
b.) SpongeBob
Patchy: "Yeah, it's him."
c.) Plankton
Patchy: "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! NOT HIM!" (Out loud) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! (Runs out in tears)

Meredith: I think he has an emotional problem.

Commercial Break

Backstage

-The Weird Guys Hanging Out are now arguing about their problems-

#1: I am not a dumb butt!
#3: And there's no problem with being a freak!
#2: (Sneers) Yeah, right.
#3: Why don't we forget about what you said, and go bug ABC guy so he won't bug Meredith.
#2: I'll go along because it's fun.
#1: Great. I can do this. It's not math, is it?
#2: No, and you are a dumb butt.
#1: Whatever. I don't know what that is.

-The three walk towards ABC Guy in what must be a cheezoid chapter ending.

-SS4Gohan

[jikeleets]

I'll read it after I get my butt off this couch (is gonna sleep) I promise :sleep:  :sleep:  :sleep:  

[garyfan]

I think I got a bad frist impression on the fanfic so I am not going to waste my time reading the rest of it when I could well do something more enjoyable

[SS4Gohan]

Okay, fine... is it just me or are my fanfics getting worse?

-SS4Gohan

[Super Ry]

No they aren't. Now when that next chapter coming out? I WANT TO READ IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII IIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT TTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

[SS4Gohan]

Okay then here's part 5

Who Wants To Be a Millionaire?
The SpongeBob Gang, That's Who!
Ch. 5
Marijuana For Life

ABC Guy: [Notices The Weird Guys walking towards him] Hey, guys! You won't believe this! Someone paid me $774,672,845,627,362,875 to air this commercial during Who Wants To Be A Millionaire!
#3: Hey, that's #2's address on the under the return address!
#2: [Laughs]
ABC Guy: [Pays no attention]
#3: Shouldn't you watch the commercial before airing it?
ABC Guy: Nah, that's what professionals do.
#2: Makes sense. You shouldn't watch it.
ABC Guy: Right. [Does something and puts it on air]
#2: [Tackles ABC Guy] That was a commercial advertising marijuana!
ABC Guy: How do you know?
#2:: [Points to label]

Label:
This is the Property of Marijuana for life, INC. A marijuana advertising commercial sponsored by Bill Gates Marijuana for the future!

ABC Guy: I didn't see that. But why shouldn't I air it?
#2: *Smash*
ABC Guy: [Out cold]

Meredith

Meredith [On cell phone]: Bill, Bill, Bill, this studio has gone mad. Not one person in the hot seat has yet to get two grand! I've got 3 more hours.
Bill [Gates] in a plane: Meredith, my buddy, it won't prevent from our vacation in as Vegas tomorrow.
Meredith: I guess so. But you won't believe what happened to the spongy guy...

The People At Home

(Everyone has decided to go Pizza Hut)

End Commercial Break

Meredith: Okay, it's time for the third fastest figure question of this three-hour long special!

-Audience cheers like wild, apparently having forgotten the previous (boring) events-

In highest to lowest, order the ratings these cartoons have had on the popular station Nickelodeon.
(a) SpongeBob SquarePants
(b) Fairly OddParents
© Rugrats
(d) Rocket Power

-Times passes-

Meredith: No one got it... [Shakes head] Amazing.
Audience Member: Why don't we just draw straws!?
Meredith: [Pretends to have not heard] Time for the fourth fastest figure question of the day.

In highest to lowest, order the amount of traffic these websites have received.
(a) Microsoft
(b) Adobe
© HTML Goodies
(d) Sponge Zone*
*This is in the future, where SZ gets millions of hits per minute

-Time passes-

Audience member: This is getting snorey! Let's just draw straws!

-Everyone swats the guy's head with a newspaper/magazine-

Meredith: Okay, let's see who got it.... uh, everyone got it in exactly three seconds?! What the <censored>!

-Sound of window breaking down in the studio door-

Voice: We want our marijuana!

-The door and roof of ABC is covered with a flashing neon sign-

MARIJUANA FOR SALE
ALL YOU WANT!
MARIJUANA!


Everyone: WTF!

-Apparently someone with no sense of humor has made the ABC studios to be a
spot that sells marijuana. When will the stupidity end?-

#1: Why are all these people here?
ABC Guy: Because, they want marijuana! Let go of me, Meredith, I need to get some marijuana!
Meredith: Uhh.... there is no marijuana here.
ABC Guy: Oh yeah. I forgot.
#2: *Smash*
ABC Guy: [Really dizzy]

The People At Home

Daughter: What's marry-jew-wanna, daddy?
Daddy: It's marijuana, honey. Mare-ih-wanna. It's illegal and bad for you.
Daughter: Can have some?
Daddy: No, it's bad for you.
Daughter: You said licorice was bad for me! But you let me have that!
Daddy: This can kill you and put you in the looney bin!
Daughter: Oh, I don't want to go inside my piggy.
Daddy: [Rolls eyes]

The Studio

Meredith: How the heck can we control these people?

-Squidward steps up from the seat-

Squidward: I can.
Meredith: How?
Squidward: Watch me.
Squidward: [Waves his hand and stirs up a hurricane. Everyone there is sent several thousand miles away]
Meredith: You're good.
Squidward: I know.

Commercial Break

-Amazingly, the commercial break goes normally-

Hallelujah! Hallelujah! Hallelujah!

Studio Showtime

Meredith: Okay, the last fastest figure question was answered at the exact same time by everybody, and ... everyone got it right! I can't take this anymore. Why did I ever get this job anyway? I've already got enough money, there's no need for popularity! [Runs off]
Mr. Krabs: C'mon everyone, we've gotta stop him!

Part 6 coming... sometime

-SS4Gohan

[Super Ry]

You get better and better Sammy. GOOD JOB! :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup:  :thumbsup: