Author Topic: The One  (Read 5190 times)

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Offline Squiddy

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The One
« on: March 13, 2005, 05:48:58 am »
Here is a poem I wrote in like five minutes on the spot for my girlfriend, so it is not so decent. But what do you guys think.


The One


   Your thought, brings joy to my darkness. Your tears of joy, mend my broken soul that once filled the ally of depression, the deep and narrow ways that once filled my life. The black bricks that build it filled with sorrow and anger you shattered, shattered with the power of kindness and friendship. Many of this dwelling had never heard of such. And have yet to be loved by those of which who care.

   Your smile revived me from such state that it lifted me, far, far up into the heavens where all my dreams were Fifield, but yet my only wish, is to wish to be with you for eternity. I wish to stay with you until the end of time, as our love grows on deeper and deeper. And when your sad day of departure arrives I shall throw myself upon you, and exclaim to the Gods “Take me, for I have sinned, and for I am not worthy of such luxury, it is I you wish to take, her graceful soul does not belong in death, and she does not deserve such tragedy. She is my bread of life, and my love of life. And one day we will meet again, in a land far greater then this, where we will life for forever more, and forever more, will she be loved.

Offline IceFox

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The One
« Reply #1 on: March 16, 2005, 02:48:54 pm »
300+/10. Very Very Good.

timstapels

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The One
« Reply #2 on: March 17, 2005, 09:39:20 pm »
great, she must of like it

Offline Squiddy

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The One
« Reply #3 on: March 18, 2005, 11:35:39 am »
Ya she did. She likes all my work.

timstapels

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The One
« Reply #4 on: March 18, 2005, 01:56:59 pm »
lol, wicked

Offline IceFox

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The One
« Reply #5 on: March 18, 2005, 03:53:18 pm »
You are really talented.

SpongeBobAndyZX14

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The One
« Reply #6 on: March 18, 2005, 05:45:28 pm »
That was nice.  Did you memorize it and tell it to her?  She must've liked it.  10/10.  I couldn't do anything like that in even ten minutes, let alone five.

Offline thedarkonexxx

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The One
« Reply #7 on: March 20, 2005, 05:57:58 pm »
11/10 that was really great
A thug changes,
A love changes,
And best friends become strangers.  -Nas, The Message

Offline Squiddy

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The One
« Reply #8 on: March 21, 2005, 05:09:32 am »
Quote
That was nice.  Did you memorize it and tell it to her?  She must've liked it.  10/10.  I couldn't do anything like that in even ten minutes, let alone five.
[snapback]160797[/snapback]

Actually I was talking to her on MSN and told her I started writing a poem about her. About ten minutes later I posted it.

Pretty romantic eh :tongue:?

2Spongebob

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The One
« Reply #9 on: March 21, 2005, 02:03:38 pm »
Nope i dont think so *giggles*  :happy:

Offline Squiddy

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The One
« Reply #10 on: March 21, 2005, 02:51:53 pm »
It doesn't matter. It is not the presentation, it is the final product.