Author Topic: A Profound Theological Statement  (Read 6222 times)

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Dragon Of Grief

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A Profound Theological Statement
« on: April 11, 2007, 10:16:03 pm »
You think God hates gays? HAH! What he clearly hates is figs...

Quote
JESUS REBUKED THE FIG AS AN EVIL ABOMINATION: "Now in the morning as he returned into the city, he was hungry.
"And when he saw a fig tree by the road, he came to it, and found nothing on it, but leaves only, and said to it, Let no fruit grow on you henceforward for ever. And presently the fig tree withered away.
"And when the disciples saw it, they marvelled, saying, How soon has the fig tree withered away!"
--Matthew 21:18-20

JESUS COMMANDED US NOT TO EAT OF THE CURSED FIG: "The next day, when they came from Bethany, he was hungry:
"And seeing a fig tree afar off having leaves, he came, if perhaps he might find any thing on it: and when he came to it, he found nothing but leaves; for the time of figs was not yet.
"And Jesus answered and said to it, No man eat fruit of you hereafter forever. And his disciples heard it.
--Mark 11:12-14

EAT A FIG, GO TO HELL: "He destroyed their vines with hail and their sycamore-figs with sleet."
--Psalm 78:47

GOD PROMISES TERRIBLE VENGEANCE FOR FIG-EATERS: "Yes, this is what the LORD Almighty says: "I will send the sword, famine and plague against them and I will make them like poor figs that are so bad they cannot be eaten."
--Jeremiah 29:17

Offline Scilla

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #1 on: April 11, 2007, 10:32:57 pm »
Haha. I love you.

Offline Thomas

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #2 on: April 12, 2007, 12:39:49 am »
LOL!  :lol:
Cloud Killed Aerith! Sephiroth knocked her out and then Cloud drowned her!!!
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I am Transgender. My old name was Sarah, it is now Tom. Sorry about the confusion.

Dragon Of Grief

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #3 on: April 12, 2007, 11:11:24 am »
Do not eat of the cursed fig or fig newton! GOD HATES FIGS!!!

 :lol:

CloneTrooperX

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #4 on: April 12, 2007, 12:37:22 pm »
Oh no...I ate a fig newton bar when I was 6...OH SNAP!!!!!!

Offline Thomas

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #5 on: April 12, 2007, 01:53:32 pm »
Does THROWING figs at people make me eviiiil?  :wacko:
I threw a fig at someone once, they didn't mind though.
Cloud Killed Aerith! Sephiroth knocked her out and then Cloud drowned her!!!
http://www.zuperbuu.com

I am Transgender. My old name was Sarah, it is now Tom. Sorry about the confusion.

Dragon Of Grief

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #6 on: April 13, 2007, 05:43:52 am »
Does THROWING figs at people make me eviiiil?  :wacko:
I threw a fig at someone once, they didn't mind though.
Sorry Sarah, you're going to hell <_<

Offline Thomas

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #7 on: April 13, 2007, 06:46:33 am »
Does THROWING figs at people make me eviiiil?  :wacko:
I threw a fig at someone once, they didn't mind though.
Sorry Sarah, you're going to hell <_<

YAAAAY!!!!  ^_^
Cloud Killed Aerith! Sephiroth knocked her out and then Cloud drowned her!!!
http://www.zuperbuu.com

I am Transgender. My old name was Sarah, it is now Tom. Sorry about the confusion.

Arkei

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #8 on: April 13, 2007, 10:34:11 am »
But...I just had a Fig.... AH!!!! *runs around in circles*

Dragon Of Grief

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #9 on: April 13, 2007, 11:03:44 am »
But...I just had a Fig.... AH!!!! *runs around in circles*
See you in hell -_-

David

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #10 on: April 13, 2007, 12:06:57 pm »
Good thing I never ate a fig in my life. XD

Offline Thomas

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #11 on: April 15, 2007, 04:53:59 am »
Good thing I never ate a fig in my life. XD

*holds her ZIM plushie up to David's face and pulls its 'talk' cord.*

ZIM plushie: HE LIES!!!

The doll has spoken!
Cloud Killed Aerith! Sephiroth knocked her out and then Cloud drowned her!!!
http://www.zuperbuu.com

I am Transgender. My old name was Sarah, it is now Tom. Sorry about the confusion.

Offline Shinya

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #12 on: April 15, 2007, 11:17:45 am »
Hmm... If fig were to be considered evil food, why doesn't devil's food cake mix taste partially like fig?
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Offline Spider-Boogie

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #13 on: April 16, 2007, 02:06:41 pm »
LYKE O SCHNAPPLES I 8 FIG NEWTONS B4!!! :wacko:
April Fool: I'm the April Fool. What's up with that?
Timmy: It's official, this guy sucks. I wish he was somewhere else!
*Poof!*
Timmy: Where'd you guys poof him to?
*Both fairies give evil smiles*
April Fool: I never asked for this!
Jorgen: Shut up, or I'll have Chuck Norris roundhouse kick you in the face again!

Rachel is my USB wife <3
Vicky is also my USB wife <3

Dragon Of Grief

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Re: A Profound Theological Statement
« Reply #14 on: April 16, 2007, 06:49:59 pm »
Hmm... If fig were to be considered evil food, why doesn't devil's food cake mix taste partially like fig?
Because the figs are tricking you! They hide the fig flavor in the devil food cake so you eat the fig and go to hell!!!